Singleness and the Church

How many friends do you have of a different ethnicity?  Of a different religion?  Of a different marital status?  Have you been to their house for dinner?  Have you invited them to your superbowl party?

I’m passionate about being a part of a multi-ethnic, multi-socio-economic Christian community.   And now I’d like to add to that, multi-marital status.

Let’s start with the Church Singles Group.  I can't even believe I'm admitting publicly that I've been to one.  I won’t tell you the year or the church to protect the innocent bizarre, but let’s just say that one night I thought, “Self, you’re good at making friends and you need to know more single people.  How bad can it be?”

WORSE.  Much worse than you can imagine.  OH MY GOODNESS.  Bible study turned into conversations from toilet training cats to being scared to make phone calls to “naughty praises” because an ex-husband broke up with his girlfriend.  Might I add that the entire time one of the two guys slept and the girl-that-never-talked hoarded food into her pockets from the snack table.

I couldn't believe my life had come to that.  I made a promise to NEVER go to another church singles event.  But, recently I’ve been thinking--other singles might not have my background with the church or my perspective to laugh it off and keep pursing authentic community.

Here are some insights I've gained into the life of a single person at a church:

• It can be hard to gear up emotionally to go sit alone at church.
• Teaching pastors are all married.  And they do a lot of preaching to the married with kids crowd.  Which is awesome because my passion in life is building up children and their families.  But every time they add a one-sentence clause about the single people, I cringe for the majority of the church.
• Most of the cool crowd seem to know each other through the “marrieds only” small groups.  Is the only way to get "in" with the church people to find a spouse? 

I pulled up the 2010 Census Data.  Just in case you haven’t seen it.  You know I research this kind of thing.  50.3% married.  6.3% widowed.  10.4% divorced.  2.2% separated. 30.8% never married.  

It’s time for us as a church to start intentionally reaching the other 50.7%  And I'm pretty sure it's not going to be through singles groups.

Who are you going to invite to dinner?

He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.  Ephesians 4:16

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Three are Even Better

I love this picture of Heidi, Abby and me at our Taylor University Floor Retreat our Junior Year.  It's a great reminder of the roots of our friendship.  And our skinnier days.  And how I broke my hand on a field-sized slip-and-slide.


But mostly, I love it for this:
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken. Ephesians 4:12

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Things I Love Thursday

Sometimes, the greatest spiritual truths are taught from a child's perspective.

Like the creation story.

"Then God said, “Hello animals!” And everyone came out to play. The earth was filled with noisy noises — growling and gobbling and snapping and snorting and happy skerfuffling. “You’re good,” God said. And they were. God saw all that he had made and he loved them. And they were lovely because he loved them. But God saved the best for last.....So God breathed life into Adam and Eve. When they opened their eyes, the first thing they ever saw was God’s face. And when God saw them he was like a new dad. “You look like me,” he said. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever made!” God loved them with all of his heart. And they were lovely because he loved them."
















And I don't care who you are. Or what your adult theology/philosophy is on the creation story. Every child, every person, every creation needs to know:

You are lovely because He loves you.

Do you know that today?

..........................................................................................................................................
Good, now about my source...

The Jesus Storybook Bible. It's my favorite.

• If you have kids, this is the best bible out there. (See what my friend Kate said about it). Some adults have been known to keep reading it after the kids go to bed, too...
• Even if you're not a Christian, I think you might still appreciate the refreshing writing and illustrating of this story. Art.
  
• If you do kid's programming, this is a great tool. We use it at SpringHill for improv skits. I narrate and my staff perform hilarious renditions of the stories. We love that it clearly and humorously communicates the message of Jesus. Because our God is funny.
  

Image is from the JSB Website. Click here to download the full creation story and other videos!

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Beyond Silly Bandz

I am heading up to the SpringHill Youth Worker's Conference today where I am leading a break-out session about connecting with kids. I've titled it "Beyond Silly Bandz" since we all know that is the obvious and easiest way to build a relationship with a child. Yes, I have been the adult in a fancy dress with a silly band accidentally still on my wrist from an earlier trade...

Today's session will open with a video of kids prayers. It's authentic. It's raw. It will touch a nerve. It will help you connect on a deeper level with a child in your life.

This video is from my friends and ministry partners at Granger Community Church in Granger, IN. They have an incredible way of telling a story visually.

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Like a Child

They say that love can heal the broken
They say that hope can make you see
They say that faith can find a Savior
If you would follow and believe
With faith like a child

-"Like a Child" by Jars of Clay

Is anyone else going through something in life where you need a little clarity? A little love of a Savior? A little push towards hope?

Check out this facebook video. It's an 8 year old sharing her story about how she had faith that her friend would come to know Christ. This is one of the reasons I love my job/mission- my GR Day Camp Team got to be a part of the faith journey of these two little girls!

I love how she says, "I know a lot about heaven because my brothers live there." If I could only see things through those eyes...

http://www.facebook.com/#!/video/video.php?v=432101176361&ref=mf

Jesus turned and saw her. "Take heart, daughter," he said, "your faith has healed you." Matthew 9:22

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